Bon bon ball

(After an "accelerating waltz"...)

Beth: Hello Edwin! [hug]

Edwin: Are you sure you want to do that? I've got accelerating sweat.

Public Service Announcement: Cory Combs is taking a dance class

Discussing said revelation over dinner -

Edwin: What made you do it, Cory? Is it a pretty girl?
Cory: No...no comment.
Allie: Was it several?
Cory: Well, you know us rappers...

South Africa

"Kin cancer."

Panayiota: "When i bought these shoes they were new!"

Simon: "Do you have a girlfriend?"
Eric: "No."
Simon: "Do you have a lifelong prayer partner?"

Simon: "This is a mission trip, man. No laughing!

Simon: "I used to look good."

Eric to Simon: "Have you driven on the autobon?"

David, in talking about the worship song, "I Want to Know You More": "'I want to see your voice'...sounds like a lie."

Carl: "T.I.A...That could mean a lot of things...This is Asia, This is Australia, etc."
ERic: "Context clues!"

Panayiota: "Why did you buy chocolate?"
Simon: "For the hormones."

Simon, mimicking Sunday schoolers: "Gimme my snacks!"

17!!!

"Ambigamous"

"gay pig"


*Since these quotes are from months ago, their context and even speakers is a bit foggy. For some I've even forgotten whey they're funny!

Jin the astute

Jin: I've noticed recently that I'm Asian.*


*(Ok, so she actually said "aging" and I misheard her. But Jin, you're not aging, and besides, I think this is funnier).

No way!

Me: I drove my stick shift here wearing high heels.
Eric: Whoa! No way! That makes you almost as cool as David Scudder!
Amy [of TFA]: David drives a stick shift in high heels?

That's "Camp Director," thanks.

My boss: "I put her in charge of fun and games today. She'll be your...[pause]...well, I guess I shouldn't really say she'll be your playmate...[pause]...Umm...?"

Autocannibalistic appetite

Cory: Stuff getting cauterized right next to your nose smells...really good! It's really appetizing!

Power outage

Beth and Grace are in the bathroom, having adhered to the time-tested feminine preference for safety in numbers.

Grace: Ooh, it is kind of scary in the dark.
Beth: ::sings music from Psycho::
Grace: Gaaah! That is REALLY scary. You just scared up my night.
Beth: Oh. Huh. I've actually never seen it.
Grace: But I have! Augh!

Grace and Panayiota share a sappy, "girl" moment on the couch while listening to Chicago's "Will You Still Love Me"...

Cory: *guffaws* Allow me that.

This post has been anonymized for your protection.

Over GTalk:



1: [Semi-random comment about comparing apples and oranges].

2: hmm, i can't come up with anything to say to that

given that it's so late here and i've had a good deal to drink

1: ROFL

2: except that I like oranges better

1: ROFL

Oh those Swedish Protestants

Allie: ...the Bible tells me sooooo. [Finishing a demonstration of "Jesus Loves Me" in a minor key]
Several people: That sounds like a dirge.
Julie: That sounds like something Swedish Protestants would sing after the reformation. "Major keys are for Papists."

Every blog should be about Cory

corycombs: No I mean it. If I were half as gangsta as you I would scorn sickness.
corycombs: But alas, I am not. However, I do have aspirations to equal the gangstaness of David scudder + 10 or so
corycombs: you are prolly rocking the french rap scene to its core as we speak

Oh sidebar ads...

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So then Eric says to Grace...

eytchu: mmm
women
wait
that was not a
"mmm" i'm hungry "mmm" women
it was a
"mmm" i'm pensive "mmm" women



(posted on Grace's behalf=o)

Alphabetical Discrimination with Mr. Combs

Cory:[...] and by the way gmail continues to list you and allie next to each other when you are both on

always at the top of the list--it is a conspiracy

me: an alphabetical conspiracy

western supremacy at work

Cory: ahhh, first names

didn't think of that

I was trying to figure out what "wilkins" and "dunworth" had in common besides strong anglo-saxon overtones

me: Cory, you are great

Cory: that's why gmail lists me first, despite alphabetical dictates to the contrary

always

me: My brother the former Google employee says to tell you I'm wrong--Gmail lists names according to etymological origin.

my bad

Cory: ahh... anglo-saxon- that makes sense!

so unless I meet a bunch of azerbijanis (is that even a language or how it is spelled?) or arabs you're both good

or aremenians...

or a bazillion other languages

never mind, that was an exceedingly stupid observation on my part

me: umm, maybe aardvarkians?

Cory: ahhh, yes

but zanzabarbarians invariably get the proverbial short end of the stick

me: right

Cory: no wonder I hardly ever chat with any

me: gosh, you're neglecting them sadly

Cory: i never see their names!

me: prejudice, that's what it is.discrimination

Cory: exactly!

me: write to Google.

and the Governator

Cory: indeed, I shall

Dear Mr. Wilkins,

me: Okay, I'm going to go play Scrabble.

Make sure you put enough postage on.

Bye Cory!

Cory: I pray thee cease thy policies of discrimination against Zanzibarbarians forthwith and create an affirmative action program to put less advantaged members of the alphabetical community at the top of the chat list.
Insincerely,

Zcory Combs

ok, so just leave while I try to attack discrimination

I see how it is

have fun!

Bye!

And yes, I can't sustain usage of outdated language for more than half a sentence

or use it correctly

so sue me

bye again!

This Is Africa, part 1...

Simon: This is a mission trip. NO LAUGHING!

Panayiota: Real sex kills...spiders.

David: I was thinking about this...the men went off to learn to fight a fire, while the women learned to serve tea.

Pastor Ohm: I believe you should get married very soon. I'll find you husband if you want!

Kid: Are you Jackie Chan?
Eric: I am Jackie Chan.
Kid: Cool! Hey, that's Jackie Chan!

Beth: I just can't get over these mountains. They're so rugged and worn.
Carl: You can get over any mountain if you try!

Andrea, Beth, Carl: You can ask us anything you want!
Student: Why is America's army everywhere, and why do they always win?
ABC: Um...

Oh dear

This is a side-bar ad that showed up in my Gmail account...

The Newest Colon Cleanse
What is known. What is unknown. Real cleansing photos. You decide.

Something fishy is going on...

After a day of snorkeling and sea kayaking, the Wilkins family returns to their lodgings. All are somewhat damp and very salty...

Mom: Whew! I just got a whiff of myself--I smell all fishy. I stink!
Paul: Actually, I just opened the smoked salmon.

A day at the beach

Eric: Allie, where's Rob?
Allie: He's in Washington.
Eric: What! Then why isn't he coming to the beach with us?

------------

Eric: Are you bleeding?
Allie: I don't think so...
Eric: Then what's that on your toe?
Allie: That's toenail polish.

What are you trying to tell me?

Charlie: Have a good life...if I don't see you...before it ends...